In episode 11, “Depression and Suicide” we discuss, in part, how depression symptoms can be different for men and women. Imagine a picture of what a depressed person looks like. Chances are you’re picturing a person who looks like they have been crying and is very sad. Of course, looking sad may be how some people with depression appear. However, that is only one of the forms that depression may take. Depression is more than just a mood. It can be manifested in multiple physical, mental, behavioral, and emotional symptoms. It is important to understand that depression is a real medical condition. Depression can seriously and negatively affect physical health, relationships with others, life satisfaction, and influence thoughts of suicide if left untreated.
There are numerous causes and forms of depression. A serious loss may propel a person toward depression, for example. Other people develop depression without any clear causal event. Depression is also influenced by chemical “imbalances”, medical conditions, sleep problems, and genetic predisposition. Additionally, plain old bad habits can lead to depression. Not taking care of yourself, not eating well, or looking at things cynically can influence depression. Interestingly, even highly successful people may suffer from depression. Numerous athletes, world famous actors, and wealthy entrepreneurs struggle with depression.
In general, men and women may show depression symptoms in different ways. While there is overlap in the symptoms between the genders, male and female depression can appear quite different.
Depression in Women
Women are more likely to talk about their sadness and seek help. This may be why women are twice as likely to be diagnosed as depressed as men. Likewise, women are twice as likely to be placed on anti-depressants. Depressed women more frequently show “acting-in” behaviors. These behaviors tend to fit the popular idea of what depression looks like. Women are more likely to focus on their own perceived short-comings and blame themselves. Common behaviors of depressed women include:
- Weeping and sadness
- Lessened interest in sex
- Heightened sense of guilt
- Self-blame
- Low self-esteem
- Lessened interest in work
- Dramatic weight gain or loss
While some forms of depression are unique to women (e.g. postpartum depression), all too often women’s very real depressive symptoms have been dismissed as the result of hormonal changes. We also see that women’s physical pain is more likely to be dismissed as imagined or manifested from depression.
Depression in Men
Women are more likely to be diagnosed as depressed (and potentially over-diagnosed.) On the other hand, most mental health experts believe that depression among men is significantly underestimated. Importantly, men are twice as likely as women to develop a substance use disorder and four times as many men as women die by suicide.
Additionally, men are far less likely than women to ask for help, even when their lives depend on it. Depressed men don’t show up at the doctor’s office for treatment, for example, and are less likely to confide in friends and family. Furthermore, the symptoms of men who are distressed may not fit well with the common stereotypes of depression. Men are more likely to express depression through what are sometimes called “acting-out” behaviors:
- Anger & irritability
- Excessive drinking/drug use
- Behaving in reckless ways
- Experiencing physical pain
- Engaging in unsafe sex
- Gambling
- Withdrawal from others
- Overworking
For these reasons men’s depression is often harder to diagnose than women’s depression. This is largely because men are less likely to talk about their sadness. It is common for men who feel overwhelmed by emotion to overwork or drink more. For example, a man might not admit that he is sad. He may not even recognize it himself. Additionally, his friends and associates may not perceive he is depressed. Instead, they may excuse or justify his behavior saying “boys will be boys.”
In Closing…
Men and women may express depression in different ways. However, the most important thing to remember is that depression can be treated. There are numerous psychological and medical treatments for depression which yield good results. If you or a loved one has suffered from depression, reach out to a mental health professional. If you have tried treatment before, and it was unsuccessful don’t give up hope. There continue to be innovations in treatment for depression ranging from new antidepressants to advances in counseling techniques.