Shame around suicide is pervasive and exists in many different forms. We may feel ashamed if we lost someone to suicide. We may feel shame if we’ve ever had suicidal thoughts. We sometimes even use shame as a tactic to try and stop someone from taking their own life. The stigma that surrounds suicide is so great that many people would rather suffer in silence then risk the shame of needing help.  If we’re serious about ending suicides, we must understand the ways that shame overlaps with suicide. By doing so we may be able to move beyond shame towards a point of healing and hope. 

We talk with Dr. Jana Tran, a psychologist, about shame. Dr. Tran has helped many high-risk groups for suicide through her years of work at the VA and serving First Responders at the Houston Fire Department. Dr. Tran examines the message “suicide is selfish.”  It is harder to seek help when there is no safe space to talk about how badly you feel without getting shamed. Additionally, those who have lost someone to suicide may also feel ashamed. Many feel guilty or blame themselves. (However unwarranted those feelings may be). Some even invent an alternate cause of death to avoid the stigma of suicide. Interestingly, the emotion “shame” has a specific and important function, that can even be transformative in the battle against suicide…If we are willing to open up about it.  You can learn more about that in this week’s blog, “Ain’t It a Shame?”