In Episode 26: Myth BUSTED: They’re Not “Really” Suicidal, we discuss how dangerous it is to be skeptical when someone mentions they’ve been suicidal. If you are wrong, the consequences can be deadly. It is true, though, people are more likely to give hints at thoughts of suicide rather than to directly threaten it. When people make comments about suicide, they are often not taken seriously. This is in spite of the fact that:
- Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US.
- Most people who are suicidal tell someone of their intent before taking actions to end their lives.
- Even trained mental health professionals have difficulty in diagnosing suicidal thoughts.
In this video link you will see a Marine who makes vague comments about suicide. Notice how his friend, another Marine, responds. She takes him seriously and gets help.
In Closing….
It is a dangerous proposition to believe that you can tell the difference between attention seeking and suicidal thoughts. To tell a person “You don’t want to kill yourself,” may lead the person to actually become more suicidal since you didn’t believe them before. Even if you know the person well, you may not recognize that they were “really” serious. Unfortunately, after a suicide many friends and family members realize that the person was telling them about their feelings of desperation. Sometimes this is a muffled cry for help. At other times, they are giving you insight into what they are considering. Would you ignore, diagnose, or rationalize a friend’s symptoms of a life-threatening disease (e.g., heart palpitations or coughing up blood)? For the same reason, you should not ignore or dismiss symptoms of suicidal thoughts. You don’t have to be a mental health professional or suicide prevention expert. You do have to be willing to take them seriously. Ask more questions. Do not leave them alone. Don’t dismiss your gut reactions. Get them in touch with a mental health professional who can help.